Miscalculation
by Animemimirue8
Summary: (ON HIATUS) Remake of No Idea by: Sashocirrione. Link inside. Irritated at being duped by L, Light attempts to get back at him by using more supernatural means than one man should have. He thinks he can handle it, but can he? LxLight, Yaoi, BoyxBoy stuff...
1. Where it all Began

**DISCLAIMER: **This story is based on "**No Idea"** by _**Sashocirrione **_with some changes to suit my tastes _**:P **_I HAVE gotten her permission to do this. Also this is my **first **attempt at a fic so please be nice ^_^  
The first chapter and _probably _parts throughout will be very similar to Sashocirrione  
The below from Sashocirrione most of it probably applies to me as well

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_/s/5339484/1/No_Idea_

_**Spoilers:**_ MAJOR Spoilers for everything up to chapter 58 of the manga and episode 25 of the anime.  
_**Warnings: **_NO UNDERAGE READERS. Rated M for a reason. Explicit contact, swearing. Bondage, consent issues, slight AU, foodplay, and other play to later be defined.  
_**Pairing: **_LxLight. It really is LxLight (L seme and Light uke) despite initial appearances.  
_**Summary: **_They are destined to be together. Supernatural forces are pushing L and Light into a romantic relationship, and there is no possible escape. But, L just doesn't seem to get how this works. What is wrong with him? LxLight presented as a crack pairing.  
_**Additional Notes:**_ This starts just after Misa has been arrested. All the canon events previous to this have occurred as normal, but from then on, things change.  
_**Disclaimer 2:**_I do not own Death Note, and I do not make any money from these writings.

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**CHAPTER 1: Where it all began...**  
Light paced back and forth in his room. This was irritating to say the least. Just when he thought he would rid himself of L, the insomniac just _**had **_to pull that stunt with the cellphone wasting no time arresting Misa immediately after. That sneaky bastard had only _pretended _to let Light into the investigation. In reality, L must have been investigating Misa secretly – and by extension Light, himself.

Now, there were so many new factors he had to take into account. Misa could talk... no that was unlikely, despite how long he'd known the girl he was confident of her loyalty to him. Rem could panic and forcibly take Misa away from wherever they were holding her, that could lead to many unwanted questions...No, Rem seemed much more intelligent than that. The best course of action that they could probably take was to have Misa relinquish her memories thereby releasing Rem from her bond with Misa allowing her to come to him for a plan.

That only left one thing for him to worry about: _What kind of plan would work?_ He couldn't just destroy the Death Notes, he had come nowhere near close enough to his perfect world. Besides if the deaths stopped completely that would just incriminate him and Misa even more, putting them in an even more dangerous situation. And the more dangerous the situation was the more likely Rem would let her emotions get the best of her and come kill him. He shuddered. No he could not let that happen. Besides, if Rem didn't kill him, he was sure L would. Whether they remembered killing or not, L would from some way to prove his reasoning.

He stopped pacing and and sat down in his chair. Leaning back, staring at the ceiling he contemplated on what to do next. It was then that it hit him. What Light needed was to get a Death Note into the hands of someone who would continue judging criminals and work as a scapegoat for him and Misa as they proved their "innocence" under L's careful 24/7 surveillance. This would be especially convincing if they both appeared their oblivious innocent selves due to the lack of their memory pertaining to the Death Note. Then sooner or later, under the pressure from the task force, L would be forced to let them go. Worst case scenario was that L would continue to keep watch on them, and perhaps even subject them to surprise searches for the rest of their lives.

However, if L got his hands on a Death Note that was another story all together. He'd probably forcibly restore their memories, force them to confess by unspeakable means if necessary, and then execute them. It was imperative that the Death Note did NOT fall into L's hands. But sadly that was an ever present risk. One he was attempting work around.

Yet it was from this point on the plan got sketchy. No matter who Light sent the Death Note to, L was smart enough to eventually catch that "KIRA" – that's what he was counting on. The question was: How would Light regain his memories _and _his Death Note without revealing its existence or at least importance and inner workings to L? The innocuous Light would want to rejoin the investigation to clear his name, but would L let him? L might, under the guise of continuing to keep a close watch on his Kira suspect, but that was iffy, a 50-50 chance at most.

In any case the task force would get the Death Note, of that he was positive. Whether or not Light would be allowed to hold the Death Note for 40 seconds even though he was a prime suspect was up for debate. Even if he managed to become a part of the investigation, he doubted L would allow him to do so. In fact, L may even decide to destroy it. No, that wouldn't be good at all!

Light abruptly sat up straight in his chair, opened the Death Note, got a pen and wrote in fake rules while expertly copying the font style. "_If the owner of the Death Note does not write a name in it for 13 days, consecutively, he or she will die._" "_If the Death Note is torn, burned, or destroyed all who have touched it will die._" Once he was done he closed the notebook and took out the separate sheet of Death Note he had. It was the sheet he used when needed scraps, it would be to conspicuous for there to be torn parts of pages if his Death Note should ever be found, L would immediately pick up on it and realize that there were fake rules. He ripped out a scrap and placed it in the secret compartment of his watch in case of emergency. He might need to use it kill the decoy should he/she prove to be a liability rather than an asset after he regained his memories. After he was done he safely placed the Death Note sheet and notebook back under the counterfeit bottom of his drawer.

Once again leaning back into his chair Light continued to plan. Misa would loose her shinigami eyes with her memories so she would have to make the eye deal again. Rem would no longer be able to offer that so there was no choice but to switch the Death Notes between Rem and L so that Ryuk would be there to make the eye deal with Misa. That way he had Misa _and _Rem. If Misa somehow failed, he _could _manipulate Rem into killing L instead. But that was a very delicate process, Rem's emotions were very volatile so it was best if Misa succeeded.

He ran the plan through his head again. No matter how he looked at it, it was an incredibly faulty plan. There were just too many holes, and if that wasn't bad enough the plan completely depended on L being stupid and letting his prime suspect come into contact with his old murder weapon. No, that just **wasn't** like L.

What Light really needed was some kind of backup plan, something to fill in the holes of his original plan and reinforce it. If he could just find some way of making L trust him, take what _his _opinions into account, blindly follow him, of influencing L's behavior and decisions...

Light stood and began to impatiently pace once again, waiting for Rem to figure out what she needed to do and arrive. Suddenly, Ryuk spoke "Hey, buddy, it's been a long time". Light's head snapped up, but Ryuk was facing the wall, talking to the air. It wasn't Rem. Ryuk listened to something, and then responded, "Hyuk, hyuk, you should see the entertainment I've been getting from this human and this L guy. It's absolutely hilarious." Again a short pause and then Ryuk nodded, saying, "Yeah, that might make it ten times as funny!" He said excitedly. "Or, it might cause my fun to end too soon. It's hard to tell what would happen." he said in a voice that could only be described as a mix between monotone and sulking.

Having enough of only hearing one side of the conversation Light got Ryuk's attention. "Ryuk," Light said, "are you talking with another god of death?" It was then that Light felt something tap his shoulder, and as he turned to see what it was a truly terrifying apparition stood in front of him. Its overall body shape was roughly similar to Ryuk, save for how it seemed fat, its head the shape of a walnut, with nothing similar to hair as Rem and Ryuk had it appeared bald. It – for it definitely should **not **be called anything else but an _it _– wore a pink and red pantsuit with shimmering gaudy stripes and bits of ribbon and lace everywhere in a massive profusion. It even wore a bonnet that was just as lacy and gaudy as everything else. Despite this, his instincts seemed to tell him 'male' when everything else in him screamed 'monster'.

It began to speak as soon as he was done assessing it, "Hello, human. I am Arminius, you could call me a god of romance rather than death." Yes, that voice certainty seemed male. Perhaps a little fruity but definitely male. As Light continued to study _it _– no _him, _he noticed a glowing red notebook hanging around the waist, attached by a glittery pink webbing to the bottom of what looked like an extremely fluffy fancy fanny-pack. He deduced that it must be the "God of Love's" equivalent of the Death Note.

Light stared up at Arminius and stated, "That's a love note, isn't it?" With an offended look on Arminius's 'face' (if you could call it that) 'he' made an irritated little sniff. He spat, "It is a romance note, not a love note. Everyone always thinks these things are love notes. Romance is so much more than just love. You can love your family members, but that's not romance unless you're incestuous."

Light ignored the unnecessary information and went ahead and asked, "Arminius, do you have something similar to the eye deal so that you can see a person's name just by looking at them?" "Of course." he answered. "Then," Light said, "how could I trade for those eyes?"  
Arminius replied, "First, I would need two romance notes like how Ryuk has two Death Notes. Which I don't see happening since the King of Romance is pretty strict in that regard. Only one note per Renaigami. But, if by some chance I convinced him to give me another one, You'd have to then become an owner of one. Then you'd have to give me your love in return for the eyes. Which is another minus on your side seeing as how you don't seem to be even remotely in love with anyone. So the deal would be a no go."

"How would _you _know if I was in love or not? and How would you take it?" Light retorted. Unperturbed Arminius replied,"When a person is in love his/her feelings stretch outwards in an attempt to bond themselves with the person they desire. The more they love and desire the stronger the bond. Romantic Love is strongest kind of bond there is between people, but even then the amount of romantic love a person has towards another varies from person to person. You're probably familiar with the term 'soul mate'. By falling in love with someone, humans are instinctively attempting to find their "soul mate". By instinct a human knows the characteristics of their soul mate without knowing who exactly that is, so when a person around them exhibits one of those characteristics often the human in question falls in love with the other. Depending on the way the bond connects to the person I can see what characteristic they found and what other characteristics they are searching for."

Light interrupted, "How are you able to that? And you still haven't explained how you would take that love." Arminius shot him an irritated look and responded "I was getting to that. Anyway, as I was saying, since usually a person falls in love with a person based on at least one of their characteristics the bond connects to that characteristic. However, your soul thinks that the other is their eternal mate, the one it has been searching for. So it attempts to connect to characteristics that aren't there. Based on what your soul is searching for I can find your soul mate and steal away your possibility of ever finding that person, and take that bond – whether it exists yet or not, meaning if you've found your true soul mate or not–and use it for myself. I can only do this if the person I'm stealing the love from is already in love with someone else. To do this sometimes I have to make two people fall in love. However that doesn't come without a price."

"The romance note always creates an intense, strong love, the love of a lifetime, that transcends barriers of culture, distance and even sexual orientation. Regardless of the obstacles involved, the two people want to be together in a romantic way as long as they are both alive. The two humans end up becoming soul mates whether it was originally intended for them to be together or not. The force bringing them together uses up half of their "Love" leaving only half for me. For me, love is life. Depending on when in life I take their love it converts into how much of their lifespan they have left. So when I take only half the love from a relationship the Romance Note creates, I only get half of each their current lifespans rather than all of their remaining lifespans. For two soul-mates together on their own, I would get **all **of their lifespan if I steal their love. The good thing about being a Renaigami is that there is no end to Romance. Taking someones love does not really harm them and Humans keep producing love so its an easy job. As long as I have feelings in me I will live eternally. **But,** as soon as I run out of feelings I will become a lifeless doll, that decomposes at some point in time." He shuddered. "So basically, depending on when I take the love from someone I get the amount of life left they have at that point added to my lifespan." He paused. "Did you get all that?"

Light simply nodded and said, "And, I assume you can't tell humans the names you see, just like gods of death can't?" "Right on" he replied bored. Light thought for a bit. He said, "If I took you somewhere and indicated a person, would you write their name down along with the details of how they fall in love? I'd like someone to fall in love so deeply that he'll give up his career just to pursue the woman."

"It doesn't work like that. I must write two names down, and the only details I can specify are when and where the love starts. Though it usually is a little slow on the uptake for one party rather than the other. So one of you would be madly in love with other thought it may take a bit for she/he to return your feelings since I'm taking half of the love." answered Arminius.

"Damn it," Light said, "I can't get his name this way, and even if he starts a romance it isn't going to allow me to influence his actions. This is no good. Let me think."  
As Light pondered the issue in his mind, he could only see one way to make it work in **his **favor. If L fell in love with _him_. Yes, that way, L would be reluctant to push any avenue of investigation that would show Light to be Kira. Even if L found absolute proof of Light being Kira, he'd never hand over the love of his life to Interpol. Furthermore, if L were reluctant and conflicted about the Kira investigation, he'd be sure to make more mistakes. This was a good plan, with only one flaw, Light would _**also **_be in love with L. Could he handle it?

Yes, Light decided. He was perfectly capable of killing anyone who stood in his way. If L were still capable of being an obstruction to Kira even when deeply in love with Kira, Light would just kill him. After all, Light had already decided that he could sacrifice his entire family if need be, sacrificing L wouldn't be any different. He knew he could kill the love of his life as well. Besides, any good cause required some sacrifice.

The thought of sex made him hesitate a bit. With the effects of the romance note at work, _if _the relationship progressed that far, he was sure he'd enjoy it immensely. The queasiness – which he refused to call arousal or nervousness since after all a God was meant to be omnipotent so he didn't scumb to lust or feel nervous – he felt at this moment would be entirely gone. It would be every bit as good as having sex with a girl once the romance note dissolved his resistance [_A/N: Air quotes around resistance XP_].

Light smirked which slowly turned into an evil grin as he thought of L crying out so shamefully, panting and moaning beneath him, begging Kira to penetrate him. Oh, what it would be like to see L reduced to nothing but a little slave at the mercy of Kira's will. The same detective who swore to bring Kira to "justice". There was no doubt in Light's mind, he'd _definitely _be on top. That social reject would never top him. There was something girlish and weak about the guy. [_A/N: I wonder why Light has to convince himself. Denial much? LoL_] Yes, that was a satisfying image even with his current heterosexuality intact [_A/N: or so he thinks XD_]. No doubt, once Light was under the effects of the note it would be positively intoxicating. Yes, if Light and L were in love, Light's crazy plan of investigating alongside L until he got his Death Note back would have at least a 90% chance of working, and even on the off chance the plan failed, there would be a back-up plan to save him from execution and maybe, allow him to continue to operate as Kira.

"Okay." Light said resolved, "Arminius, I would like you to follow me until I meet with a man I'll call Ryuzaki, and then I want you to look at his _true _name and write it down along with mine so that we fall in love immediately." Ryuk began to cackle maniacally, seemingly unable to stop.  
Arminius, appearing insulted responded, "I'm _not _your little **slave**, human. If you want me to make you and this 'Ryuzaki' fall in love, you'll have to _pay _me the same way you pay Ryuk."  
"With apples?" he asked naively.

"No. Apples don't interest me." Ryuk managed to stop cackling for long enough to make an outraged gasp,"How could you say that Arminius?" Light cut in before Ryuk could distract Arminius, "Quiet Ryuk! Continue Arminius..." Ryuk continued to stare at Arminius dumbfounded but kept silent. Sighing slightly Arminius continued, "How about this, you will be the one to fall in love with "Ryuzaki" first and you will provide me with entertainment. I'll be watching all of this play out with interest, and I won't leave until the end, no matter what you say." "Can't you just have Ryuzaki fall in love first as payment?" Light inquired.

"Oh no," Arminius said, "that isn't how it works. You can't promise something like that. You see, this kind of deal has to be consensual on the part of the person I'm making this pact with."  
Light gritted his teeth in irritation. How annoying, Arminius could be hindrance if he chose to interfere at weird times."Can't you at least leave once you've written our names?"Light inquired. "Well, if you wore perfume I suppose I could." He stared blankly at Arminius "What does _that _have to do with anything?" said Light in exasperation. "Well to be honest, you humans, along with most of the world, STINK! Luckily some of you save yourselves by using perfume and surrounding yourselves with flowers. but without perfume or flowers, I just can't STAND the smell. So if you want me gone, and would like an easier price, I suppose perfume is the way to go." He concluded in an eager tone.

He heaved a loud sigh of resignation. That seemed to be the best solution. Light got up and entered his bathroom, took out his cologne and sprayed a single spray on each shoulder, and returned back to his original spot in front of Arminius. "Would this be ok?" Light asked calmly. Arminius took in a deep breath, scrunching up his nose in distaste he replied, "I **said **_perfume_. There _is _a difference between perfume and cologne ya' know!" Then, after a short pause, he continued "Also, I think I should warn you if the scent starts fading, I'm gone! So I suggest to reapply periodically, and preferably apply at least half a bottle at any particular time." Light could feel his right eye begin twitching but went to comply anyway. He would not let this _thing_, make him loose his composure, he reminded himself_*I can do this, I need Arminius' help to do eliminate L, so that means I have do this. It's ok this is simply another step towards my goal. I can do this* ._

After spending a good fifteen minutes deciding on five bottles that wouldn't have him smelling **so **fruity that people would think he was _on _something. He faced the mirror, took a deep breath in and held it. Closing his eyes tightly, he unscrewed the top of one bottle dumping the entire contents onto the front of his shirt, stashing the other four in his pocket. Exhaling in a rush, he took in his first breath after wearing the perfume and grimaced. The smell was so strong it made him dizzy, Light doubted he'd ever get it out of his shirt. Looking at his reflection in the mirror, he scowled. He felt pathetic to be affected just by some stupid perfume. Light ran a hand through his hair and sighed, he was to be the God of the new world. He wouldn't let it end here. With renewed determination, he walked back to his room. As he walked in Arminius leaned over, sniffing him like a drug addict, his face a picture of bliss, similar Ryuk's when he ate apples.

Ryuk smirked at the sight and said, "Oh, Light, you smell lovely." Light kept his face blank, but scathingly said, "Shut. Up. Ryuk."

When it seemed that Arminius was done, he looked at the clock. 11:52 pm. It was getting late, there was no point in depriving himself of sleep to wait for Rem. He'd just sleep until Rem got here. Walking over to light switch he turned it off. "I'm going to sleep" he announced to no one in particular. He climbed into bed, and just as he was about to attempt to sleep a thought crossed his mind. "Ryuk, wake me when Rem gets here and I will give you an apple before he leave to where L is." Ryuk excitedly replied "Okiedokie!"

Light couldn't sleep. The smell was unbearably intense, and Rem still hadn't come. He was beginning to wonder if he had overestimated her intelligence level. Unwilling to let his thoughts go down that road, he paced in his room for the next several hours until finally, Rem came. By then, it was four in the morning, and with two death gods to keep watch, it wasn't at all difficult to sneak out of the house, right past the "stalker" L had watching him and continuing on, to a secret spot in the woods.

With Arminius hovering nearby, Light exchanged the Death Notes and proceeded to send Rem on her way with instructions to find a suitable scapegoat Kira. As soon as Rem was gone, Light began explaining to Ryuk his plan to give up memories of the Death Note while under scrutiny of L. Arminius, who had been silent until this point, chimed in, "You'll forget about me too, when you give up your Death Note. But, when the memories return, you'll remember me as well." Light replied, "That will make things easier. I don't think I would have told anyone such a ridiculous story anyway, but if I remembered about Romance Notes I might suspect myself too much, and that wouldn't be good. I need to be as innocent as possible for L."

Light smiled haughtily to himself, thinking about how thoroughly he would get under L's skin and upset L's plans. He'd be so innocent, that cute little L would be unable to do anything about it. Especially with the force of destiny itself working against him. This time, it would be Light who had the upper hand. Not L.

Just then, Arminius taunted, "I think the smell is fading. You'd best reapply now, or I might go away." Light ground his teeth together and, got another bottle of perfume out of his pocket, and dumped half of it on himself. Immediately Arminius was on him like a dog in heat. He had to forcefully push his face back as he made his trek back home. He needed to get some rest before heading into Headquarters. He just knew today was going to be a long day.

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[A/N:] ANNND That's my attempt at a first chapter. Please Read and Review! I want to know how people like this before I upload the next chapter.

If you'd like you can read the story I'm basing this off of, but I'm hoping to take this story in a completely different direction. I know this first chapter is VERY similar to Sashocirrione but I promise I will deviate more from her ideas as this goes on. I'm pretty sure this seems like plagiarism T-T ...

Well I'm going to stop now before I get more negative, anyway please R&R, constructive criticism is welcome.

~Mimi


	2. Chapter 2 SNEAK PEEK

**A/N:** Hi guys! Just wanted to let you know I did NOT forget about this story. Life has just been really really really hectic and so it has taken me 7 months to get a little over half-way through Chapter 2. I hope to get it done soon and have the entire Chapter up by the end of this week. Keep your fingers crossed ^_~ In the mean time, to wet your appetite, (dedicated to _InvaderNyoko_) I have posted a chapter sneak peak. These are the first 3 paragraphs of the next chapter and should give you a taste for what's to come ;) XP. Enjoy!

CHAPTER 2: **Putting the Plan into Action **_**Sneak Peek**_

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It was around eight when Light woke up. Surprisingly, the agonizing scent of perfume had diminished and Arminius was still present, seemingly preoccupied playing with Light's old Rubik's cube. Taking this as a sign that Arminius wouldn't be leaving anytime soon, Light quickly arose from bed and proceeded to go about his daily routine of picking out clothes for the day, bathing, brushing his teeth, and brushing his hair.

First order of agenda: What to wear. After a quick survey of his closet he decided to wear a pair of dark blue - almost black - pair of skinny jeans with a rich brown belt. Accompanied by a silky, tight, black shirt whose sleeves reached just past his elbow and a white jean jacket without sleeves, which covered half of his torso. He hoped to look as subtly arousing as he could. While it wasn't necessary for Light to put in all the extra effort - after all he was most definitely attractive without it - it wouldn't hurt. These subtleties could be what tipped the scale in his favor and make his job of seducing L that much easier. There was no other reason for it. Light _ignored _the minuscule, irrational, part of him that took an almost _perverse _pleasure in looking good for _L_. He shook his head, _refusing _to acknowledge that such a part of him even _existed_.

Taking his clothes with him, Light headed towards the bathroom making sure to lock the door behind him as he entered. After setting his clothes on the counter beside the sink, Light walked to the shower and turned it on. Once it was running, he eagerly shed his clothes which **somehow,** _still _had the shallow scent of perfume clinging to it. By the time he was nude, the whole bathroom had become humid and warm. Steam flowed out of the shower, its vapors cloaked the mirrors and glass walls of the shower. Taking this as a sign that the water was adequately warmed, Light opened the glass door of the shower and stepped into the running water, sighing in content as the tepid rushing water relaxed his tense muscles. '_This feels so good' _ he thought sleepily. Feeling so at ease, Light inadvertently took in a deep breath and began to gag. Pinching his nose in a mix of delirium and annoyance he cursed at his rotten luck. He still smelled like that damn perfume. The accursed liquid seemed to have absorbed into his skin. '_Ugh'_ he thought, '_I'm going to need to scrub really hard to get this out'_.

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**A/N:** Oh and another little spoiler: The next chapter will be rather slow and detail heavy (in the opinion of my Beta) so, sorry about that. Any case I hope you guys are excited!


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